Life Stories.

Moving On.

29 March 2009

The one that we love will leave us forever one day. It had just recently happened to me during the March holidays. i never knew it could happened this fast ):

It all started on the 12th of March , when aunty brought him to clinic and the doctor sent him to NUH emergency there . i was having my hell fun in school since it was speech day but just when i reached home around 10pm plus , i received that news . mummy , brother and i took the last bus to NUH . we waited and waited till about 3am plus , finally doctor told us he was warded in ICU ward . she then told us all about his condition , saying that his heart attack dieases had affected his lungs which means he got ung affection . she also told us that there's 15% or less chances of him living . we all begged , pleaded to the doctor to do what she can for him and she said she will try her best. And never i thought , it will be the last time of me talking to him . mummy asked me to apologised to him etc etc . i apologised to him and he also apologised back . during that time his face was very different . because of this , i didnt attend school the next day , i overnight there.

When i woke up next day , i went to the ward and find him unconsious . its because doctor did the thing where by tubes were all in his mouth and wires were plucked all over him . the next thing i knew , tears were flowing down my cheeks . yess its really painful to see all those things . i can see him suffering cause tears did drop downs his cheeks too ): .

The next few days he was in coma. his condition became very critical . almost all relatives came and prayed for him . i keep crying everytime i entered the ward . i prayed and prayed and prayed if miracle could happen and make him recover . but no it didn't happened . on the 15th of March , doctor said he has no chances of living , just waiting for time to go . that's when we all burst out crying . so since we had enough of seeing him suffer , we asked doctor to take out all the tubes and he left with only wearing oxygen mask . he then was tranferred to normal ward the next day .

We continued to say our prayers every single day without fail . On tuesday he was brought back to choa chu kang , at aunty's hse . since he had told grandma that he wants to die at home not at the hospital . and so we stayed there till 10pm plus and went home since the next day i had to go for the GOS trip to batam . i was half-hearted about going actually. that very night , when i packed all my things , my mind was on him . and when i went to bed that time , i cant sleep and my eyes kept blinking numerous times without fail . images of him appearred. finally i manage to sleep . then suddenly i was woken up by 2nd brother and told me that tok was no longer alive. tears started to roll down my cheeks again. i just cant believe.

Brothers and i quickly changed went to mak ngah's house by car with mak busu and husband . reached there , tok was already covered with cloth . cried again but i prayed too. i cancelled my batam trip so that to see his funeral for the last time . by 9am the house were full of people . guys went to bath for him and us wait outside. then when they finished the body was carried to the hall . thats the very last time i kissed his head. tears keep rolling . finally they wrapped him with the cloth and thats when i cried non-stop. we then went to the cementry watched him got down to his grave. it was my first time witnessed the whole thing . the placed was 7 feet above the ground . imagine that he will be living there alone? i cried again and again till there no more tears to go down. went back and had kenduri . it was on till the 7th day . yes straight 7 days. it ended last tuesday . the next two days i took mc . till now it feels like a dream that he's gone ):

The one who was there when i was born.

The one who used to sent and fetched me sometimes to school with his old bicycle.

The one who worked as a security guard for quite a long time and got the prime minister lee sien loong's award.

The one who loves to tell his army stories , kampong stories numerous of time when we gather as a family.

The one that has a beautiful wife , 3 wonderful daughters and 7 lovely grandchildrens.

The one who was a religious man , keep praying even when he's not well.

The one that never tells us if he's in pain or suffering , he prefer to keep to himself.

The one that always be the imam when we prayed.

The one who we celebrate with every Hari Raya Puasa.

The one without fail keep gripping hands when people salam him.

The one that always gives me advices like study hard , take care of mummy and be a good daughter.

The one who LOVES to tease me when i eat more with his coughing sound effect.

The one who LOVES to menyakat everyone .

The best one and only grandpa that i could have ever asked for .

Half of my heart felt something missing and thats you.

You've gone forever and will never come back.

I love you grandpa , i miss you grandpa.

Indeed everyone do.

Rest in peace.

Semoge Allah mencucuri rahmat mu.

17 March 2009

"We're meant to lose the people we love.

How else would we know how important they're to us?"

- The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button

p.s : ain will accept grandpa , ain love grandpa.

ain redha tok , ain sayang tok.

);

06 March 2009

Finally its friday . i had a very tired week of school . this week i had maths test it was bloody hard and got back my science test . didnt did too badly , but failed ): . i did studied the previous night but maybe luck wasnt on my side . hopefully when the marks are added to the overall for CA1 , i can get a passed.

So let's just skip about studies . yesterday wasnt a good day for me , really . i was so down and lost my mood . my friends asked why i was like that , what happen etc etc . i myself dont know . all i know was my heart was really heavy that day feeling like alot of bad things would happen and unfortunately it did ): . yessssss , i cried for a moment . but all change after i had my drama test and the girls decided to go to my house . they were being such a sweetheart trying their very best to cheer me up . thanks girls :) . yess yess as we stepped into my house , i began to forget all happened just now and my oldself came back ! we lot had so much funnn . aishah's doing the project after that they kept eating the snacks and tea break made by mother , watched twilight , laugh laugh laugh :D . then they had dinner before they went home around 6.40pm and you know what ? mummy gave them money ! haha yeahhh ;)

As for today its CCA day , okaylah . well im begining to cheer up . footdrills were tiring as per usual under the hot scothing sun . i tell you i was sweating like hell -.- . then we did cheers , first aid . quite fun ahh . i think im begining to be a part of st john family yeah? haha . after that went back to class , ms goh with her usual "talk" . one thing about her she keep liking to re-tell what she said days before and she liked to share her so called "experience" with us . yesss what she said all was true and i find it interesting but she actually did already tell us . haha . anyway she asked us to do an item to perform for lunch time concert . and she asked me to sing ! yess because probably she had heard me sing the japanese song when i didnt realised she was there that time, haha see served me right . see howww lahhh kkkk . if theres supporters then i'll do it . hah cheyyy . so after that had hip hop dance from 12.45pm - 2pm and then i went to go for my GOS to do my CIP . was alone , aishah wasnt with me she went training , nad and sita went home so i was left with irshad and lala . ended about 4 plus and met aishah and the others , headed to mac since i had only 100 plus drink during recess and a biscuit, as per usual i was hungry . ahhah . actually somewhere between there something happened among this group and this person , shall not elaborate . i left straight after had my apple pie and went back home straight . right now im freaking tired , my legs are hurting ):):):

Tomorrow there's st john , ohh wells D: . we have to sit for a test and its from 10.15am till 1pm . i donnoe beside doing the test we will do footdrills or not , . and anyway i have no idea about st john test coz i got nothing like notes or whatever to study for it but since aishah have , i'll be meeting her at our usual bus stop at 8am and i'll study at mac for about an hour or so . hopefully i can pass , which is so impossible! haahha . so yeah im at mum's , tmrww then hits to dad's . btw i want to show u guys my super duper hot boyfriend , Nickhun ! :)

Cute isnt he ? i know :D . of course he's my thailand-american but learnt korean boyfriend .__________________. Nickhun oppa , i so love youuuuu! Only you :) klahhhh stop it ain . i should get going to bed since i have to wake up early tmrww . byyyyyeeeeeeee [:

01 March 2009

So yesterday i went to meet nad at bukit merah for study group but it turned out to be only the two of us since aishah and sita didnt reply my msg . anyway its a last minute plan . So i woke up as early as 9.45am and got ready . left the house at 11am and met nad in the bus . first we went to mac but then the environment wasnt what i expected it to be and its noisy so we moved and made our way to the library . since nad has no homework except her journal , her took a nap . hahah . and what did i do? i did my 14 tough maths sums . yessss i was talking to myself doing the questions , hahha. finally i managed to finished it in about 45 minutes and then i woke my dear nadia up . after that we look around for books for a while and we dropped by the posb since nad had to put in some money in her sister's account . after that off we go to mac donald to have our lunch .

Imagine that i didnt eat a thing till lunch time . dont talk about drinking , seriously . at that moment i can already hear my stomach made those grumblings sounds , haha. so nad and i decided to share a meal . we had mc wings meal plus an additional med fries since nad wants to . the cashier was li xin , my dear classmate . hahah . talked to her for a while and as usual she kept complaining she's hungry , lol . after that nad and i had our meal and talked talked talked . i tell you yesterday the very first time my dearest bestfriend eat alooooot ! yesss after the meal she said she wanted the vanilla ice-cream while i already is abit full . but still i had the vanilla ice-cream with her . after she had finished the ice-cream , you know what she said? im still abit hungry ahh . hahaha shocking isnt it? but im veryyyy happy for her ! hohohhahaha . at about 3 plus took 197 and went to granny's house . at granny's i read the book i borrowed all the way . since its raining , we went back at about 6.30pm . reached home i continued reading the indonesian novel and manged to finished it ! yesssss , i love the whole story line :) i rate it 5/5 . go search at library for this novel entitled " Samudra " .

As for today , i stayed at home the whole day since it's raining heavily here . thank god i finished all my homeworks yesterday and today i can relax abit . i just ended my msn conversation with my new korean friend named John ! {: . yessss he live in korea , so goood righhht. looking forward to chat with you again John Hangjun !(: . since i have no one to talk to , i think im going to change my blogskins since i've been using it for ages . after that im going to continue to watch my korean drama :D:D:D . till then , takecare people . have a happy week schooling !